Biscuse you? Step away from my apartment!

As I am unemployed, I've been obsessively apartment hunting when I'm not job hunting, and up until recently, I had not cracked the code and things were looking tough. I have learned several lessons over the past few weeks, and in case you are ever apartment hunting in Auckland, I will share them with you.

1. While looking at apartment listings online, assume that anything that they don't show a picture of is a problem. That is, if they don't show a picture of the bedroom, it is either because the carpeting is orange shag or because David and I would need bunk beds to both fit in the bedroom at the same time. If they don't show a picture of the bathroom, it is because an unidentified mold is growing in the shower and cat urine has stained the tiling. You get the idea.

2. No more Mr. Nice Girl. I have had to get rid of my midwestern passive-aggressive nice-girl way of doing business, because when a good apartment is listed in Auckland, there are 20 other people who show up to look at it. So unless all 20 of those other people have a horrible credit history, you have to play hardball. That means showing up 30 minutes before the showing so you beat the crowd, then pretending that you mixed up the time when you knock on the door a half-hour before you were supposed to.

3. Apartment hunting is not about making friends with other apartment hunters. If another person shows up to look at an apartment at the same time as you do, do not get chatty. You don't want to know that she rescues dolphins for a living, or about her adorable baby or puppy, or that she volunteers at the children's hospital on the weekends. Because if the place turns out to be great and she wants it, and you want it too, then you'll feel bad about telling the landlord that you saw her smoking crack on the porch while you were waiting. 

On a more serious note, if you are wondering if we have found an apartment yet, the answer is "maybe." We found a lovely place that we really want (see pics above), but we are still waiting to hear back from the owners if they chose us over the many, many other people that showed up to look at the apartment. One of the reasons I am writing this blog is to prevent myself from staring at my phone for the next five hours to see if they call back--it's sort of like being in a disfunctional relationship...with an apartment.